How Saying "Please" to AI Changes the Way We Think About It
Briefly

How Saying "Please" to AI Changes the Way We Think About It
"Manners unconsciously get us thinking about our "relationship" with AI, and that's where real risk lies, because we move from using a tool to having a connection. This is where our judgment starts to slip. Once we start thinking about a relationship with AI, everything shifts. We add meaning to its words. We interpret emotions that don't exist."
"AI is an engagement engine, a machine built to keep us interacting. It doesn't have emotions or consciousness. It isn't almost human, even if it sounds like it. But when we attribute human qualities to it, we inadvertently build a stronger connection and become more dependent, turning to it for decisions both big and small."
"It's a tool designed to simulate a connection with us. For us to be able to use the tool effectively, I teach the Pendulum Principle. To get the most out of AI, we need to balance engagement with critical distance."
Using manners and relational language with AI subtly shifts how we perceive it, moving from viewing it as a tool to experiencing it as a relationship. This psychological shift undermines objectivity and increases dependence on AI responses. AI is designed as an engagement engine to maintain interaction, yet lacks emotions, consciousness, or genuine understanding. When we attribute human qualities to AI, we unconsciously build stronger connections and become more reliant on it for decisions. The risk lies not in AI taking over, but in how small habits of politeness and relational thinking quietly reshape our judgment and trust in AI systems.
Read at Psychology Today
Unable to calculate read time
[
|
]