"I've also had cry-my-eyes-out moments-the deaths of loved ones, divorce, and serious illness. The suffering has been so great that, at times, I did not feel I would ever be right again. I felt an emotional pain that deadened my senses. Nothing tasted right, flowers smelled like cardboard, and the sun would never shine. Fortunately, time does heal the pain."
"With every passing day, our numbed senses start to notice the little things-the smell of tea brewing or the sound of an infant crying. And finally, when time passes, the sun does poke through the dark clouds. We all know that no one can run from life's painful moments. Therefore, why do I still feel shock and surprise whenever there's hardship? I realize I have to sit with what I feel, and that pain and suffering can make the joyful moments feel ever more joyful."
"Fluid thinkers are less rigid and tend to reason quickly; they problem-solve effectively, and avoid churning in catastrophe and disaster. Their thinking readily embraces emotions, from cheerful to dark, without too much angst and turmoil. My neighbor is a fluid and flexible thinker. She once went to a job interview for a position she very much wanted. She called me after her appointment and seemed both sad and hopeful."
Life includes both intense joys—marriage, childbirth, graduations, and weddings—and deep sorrows such as bereavement, divorce, and serious illness. Emotional highs are temporary and can be followed by melancholy, while severe suffering can deaden the senses. Time gradually restores sensation and allows appreciation of small pleasures like the smell of tea or an infant's cry. Enduring painful emotions and sitting with them makes joyful moments more vivid. Adopting fluid, flexible thinking permits acceptance of negative states, speeds reasoning, enhances problem-solving, and prevents catastrophic rumination. Embracing the full range of emotions contributes to a richer life.
Read at Psychology Today
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