Why High-Achieving Men Suffer in Silence

Men often appear to function well despite sleeplessness, stress, and difficulty concentrating, but the ability to handle many responsibilities can also hide distress. Men seek mental health care at lower rates than women even when equally distressed, with psychotherapy use consistently higher among women and the largest gaps among younger adults. Emotional suppression is common in men and can damage relationships while worsening psychological health. High-achieving men face particular vulnerability to burnout because performance expectations reinforce the belief that they should manage everything alone. Therapy can offer an outside perspective similar to the support high performers already rely on, helping them recognize and address what they are carrying.

"A lot of American men seem to be doing pretty well these days - at least, on the outside. Despite a jumble of obligations at work and at home, they're still meeting deadlines, maintaining their social lives, and showing up for their partners or families. They might struggle through a few sleepless nights here and there, or have to work all weekend every once in a while, or take the red-eye that gets in just before an important meeting - but that's normal, right?"

"That same ability to take on so much, and the belief that you should be able to handle it, is also what makes it hard to see the distress you feel. So what does it actually cost to keep it together, and how long can you keep that up before something breaks? This dynamic may be true for all American adults, but it's especially true for men these days because they aren't seeking out the care they need."

"According to Eggenberger et al. (2021), while 52 percent of American women had received mental health care over the preceding year, only 40 percent of men had. A 2026 study by Kleidermacher et al. found consistently higher psychotherapy use among women than men - especially among adults between the ages of 18 and 25, where the gap is as high as 22 percentage points."

"Emotional suppression is common in men, and it damages relationships and worsens psychological health. High-achieving men are especially vulnerable to burnout. Therapy can provide the outside perspective that high performers already use."

Read at Psychology Today