Nick's determination to not be average drives him to use performance and image-enhancing drugs, reshaping his physicality at a time of personal crisis. Even amid his brother's cancer diagnosis, Nick says 'I wake up with a smile,' feeling empowered by testosterone and other steroids. However, while his physical strength increases, the emotional toll becomes evident as he faces heightened aggression and relationship breakdowns. Despite these side effects, he remains undeterred, prioritizing his physical transformation over potential risks.
The mental side effects of steroid use take an emotional toll on Nick. He notes that under the influence, he feels like 'a soldier' and is emotionally resilient. Without the drugs, the reality of his brother's cancer would weigh heavily on him. Yet this newfound confidence comes at a cost, as he struggles with impulsive rage, shattering relationships with loved ones. Despite being aware of the impact, he insists on continuing his use, saying, 'If God wants me to overdose on steroids, then that’s my story.'
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