"In today's world, there are a lot of people who like to intensely criticize others while rarely taking responsibility for their own behavior. They often have traits of Cluster B ( narcissistic, antisocial, borderline, and histrionic) personality disorders, which tend to be "dramatic, emotional, or erratic" 1 and have strong associations with "domineeringness, vindictiveness, and intrusiveness." 2 If you have to deal with such a person, either occasionally or every day, there is a simple way to minimize the impact of their negative words on you."
"First, come up with one (or two) short statement(s) affirming one or more of your positive qualities. Write it down to help you remember it. In our High Conflict Institute trainings, we call this an "encouraging statement" and help people practice it as described below. The idea is that you can give yourself such a statement anywhere, at any time. You want it to be simple and short, so you can remember it when you're under stress."
Many people display intense criticism and avoid responsibility, often showing Cluster B traits such as narcissistic, antisocial, borderline, or histrionic behaviors associated with domineeringness, vindictiveness, and intrusiveness. A practical strategy uses short, positive affirmations that affirm specific personal strengths. Write the statement down and keep it simple, short, and free of comparisons or negative words. Practice saying the affirmation aloud while a friend or partner plays the role of a critic so the affirmation is available during real criticism. Saying an affirmation during criticism can reduce the critic’s emotional impact partially or completely and helps when setting limits.
Read at Psychology Today
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