At 18, a mother's comments about weight triggered anger that transformed into binge-eating and a cycle of bingeing and restriction. By 25, attendance at Overeaters Anonymous did not resolve the problem. Over two decades, many diets were tried and weight fluctuated through two pregnancies. Attempts to engage with body positivity proved difficult. In October 2021, at age 42, a museum visit with a seven-year-old son led to encountering an 11cm replica of the Paleolithic Venus of Willendorf. Observing the figurine's full, rounded body produced intense joy and immediate relief, validating that humans have always come in varied shapes.
The shaming came before the bingeing: I was 18 and my mum told me I needed to start being careful with my eating, because I was getting fat. She would say: You'd be so pretty if you'd just lose weight! I wasn't overweight at the time, and I felt so angry. But young women aren't allowed to be angry so, with nowhere to put those feelings, I channelled them into food, spiralling into binge-eating as an act of revenge.
She is, by modern standards, either pregnant or could be described as obese. My eyes fell on to her wonderful chubby bottom, her arms draped over her big breasts. There's a fat, pouchy bit above her vulva. A lovely protruding belly, with a belly button that looks just like mine. I felt intense joy, and immediate relief at this proof that humans come in all shapes and sizes, and always have have
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