Your daughter, now 34, feels she missed out on teenage experiences and wishes to revert back to that time. She struggles with body image issues, influenced heavily by social media, and desires surgical procedures to appear younger. Despite wanting independence, she remains dependent, lacking a social life and interests. Her mental health is at risk, threatening her life due to feelings of inadequacy. Transitioning from external to internal referencing of self-worth is crucial for her recovery, along with developing essential life skills to cope with the complexities of adulthood.
It sounds as though your daughter's life is online, where curated and idealised images are likely feeding her body dysmorphia and sense of inadequacy.
Moving towards internal referencing would allow her to ground herself in her own sensations, experiences and values rather than being ruled by her assumptions about others' opinions.
Being stuck in external referencing is a recipe for anxiety and depression.
It seems she has not yet acquired some necessary life skills, namely: tolerance for frustration, flexibility, problem-solving and empathy.
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