I thought my powerlifter father was the strongest man in the world. But a secret steroid addiction took him and us to the brink

"When I tell people that a drug addiction nearly killed my dad, I know what most of them are thinking. Heroin. Crack. Maybe meth or ket. Those substances that steal your soul and slowly wreak havoc on your body. They're imagining Trainspotting; too-skinny frames and protruding hip bones, the physical effects of addiction that are impossible to miss. But that isn't how it played out in my family."

"My dad's drug addiction didn't ravage his body. Instead, it built it. As a 17st 7lb powerlifter, he looked to my childhood eyes like something of an adonis. Friends fancied him. Boys in my class coveted his physique. There was never any question of my dad's harder than your dad in my school playground. It was always my dad. And I loved him for it."

At age 13, when the parents' marriage collapsed over a few grey November weeks, the mother, brother, and child had no idea the father was addicted to drugs until after he left. The father's addiction did not ravage his body; as a 17st 7lb powerlifter he had an admired, muscular physique, ate large quantities of protein and carbohydrates, rarely drank, and trained obsessively since age 15. He prioritized gym sessions even over his stag do. Born six years after the second world war, he grew up on a council estate after relocation from the East End in a working-class household of four children with modest comforts and sporting achievements including semi-professional football and a school sprint record.

Read at www.theguardian.com