"Of course, there are narcissists who seek as much recognition and approval from others as they can, but that's not usually who I see in my practice. Instead, it's the more average Joe or Jane who struggles not because they crave power, but because they're afraid of conflict and upsetting others. They feel stressed and pulled by wanting acceptance and approval from too many masters."
"What keeps them from stopping is not only habit and autopilot but also fear of what might happen if they stop accommodating others. If you're feeling the same, here are several questions to help you break free: #1: How would your life change in a positive way if you stopped worrying about others' approval? Can you imagine being free from the anxiety of constantly wondering what others might think? What would you do differently than you're doing now?"
Many people shape their lives to fulfill others' needs and expectations, sacrificing their own desires to avoid conflict and gain acceptance. Habit, autopilot behavior, and fear of others' reactions keep them accommodating even when they want to stop. That fear includes worries about confrontation, rejection, loss of connection, or swinging into selfishness. Asking targeted questions about how life would improve without constant approval, what specific fears exist, and how one might act differently helps clarify options. Breaking free requires recognizing when fear has taken over, approaching anxiety directly, and deliberately stepping beyond comfort zones to reclaim autonomy.
Read at Psychology Today
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