How to Talk About Trauma With Children

"But silence can be more harmful than imperfect words. Because silence tells a child you're either unaware, uncaring or "Your pain is too much for me, it's better to just pretend it never happened."I say - Lean into the discomfort. It's okay to feel scared or out of your depth. That means you're connected, and ironically, your attuned presence is already therapeutic."

"Before you can talk about trauma with a child, you must regulate your own nervous system. You cannot offer what you haven't practiced.Dr. Daniel Hughes, creator of Dyadic Development Psychotherapy (DDP), developed the P-A-C-E model, a trauma-informed attachment approach that begins with you.It's a way of being with a child rather than doing something to them. P³ - Have an attitude of Patience, Presence, Playfulness. Stay grounded and patient."

Many children carry deep, unprocessed wounds while adults often remain silent, fearing they might say the wrong thing. Silence can convey unawareness, indifference, or that a child's pain is too much to hold, which can exacerbate isolation. Healing requires adults to lean into discomfort and to offer attuned presence, curiosity, and empathy rather than perfect words. Adults must first regulate their own nervous systems before engaging a child. The P-A-C-E model provides a trauma-informed, attachment-based way of being with a child that emphasizes presence, safety, and restoring a child's sense of control.

Read at Psychology Today