"We don't misinterpret others because we're bad people or because we want to feel hurt. Being human means feeling the need to be part of something larger than oneself, like a social group or a community. The possibility of being excluded from such a group, therefore, presents a constant threat to our well-being. "Social pain" stemming from this kind of rejection or exclusion has been found-in a 2004 experiment by Eisenberger & Lieberman-to activate the same or similar areas of the brain as physical pain."
"Instead of relying on assumptions, look for evidence of a real slight. Try to reframe others' actions through a neutral lens. Remember: Other people are thinking about you a lot less than you think they are. Imagine these scenarios: A friend doesn't respond to your message for two days, and you assume they're annoyed with you. In a team meeting, your colleague interrupts you before you finish your point. You interpret it as disrespect."
Pause before reacting to perceived provocations and recognize that feelings are not always factual. Seek evidence before assuming intentional slight and reframe ambiguous behaviors through a neutral lens. Common ambiguous situations include delayed messages, interruptions, partners checking phones, and ignored waves, which can trigger harsh feelings of criticism or exclusion. Humans impose emotional filters and often jump to conclusions about others' intentions because belonging feels essential and potential exclusion threatens well-being. Experiments link social pain from rejection to brain regions activated by physical pain. Practicing evidence-seeking and neutral reframing reduces misinterpretation and lessens unnecessary anger.
Read at Psychology Today
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