Holidays got you burnt out? Carve out moments of solitude, say experts | CBC Radio

"I'd like to get up on the rooftops and cry out, It's OK to ask for some me time,' psychologist Robert Coplan told The Sunday Magazine host Piya Chattopadhyay. Between office parties, family gatherings and plans with friends, there can be lots of socializing crammed into the final weeks of the calendar. But Coplan, a chancellor's professor of psychology at Carleton University, says spending time in solitude can offer a chance to catch our breath."

"While people tend to equate loneliness and solitude, Coplan, author of The Joy of Solitude: How to Reconnect with Yourself in an Overconnected World, says they're distinct. Solitude is often construed as a punishment, but if we flip it around in our head and think of it more as a reward even a gift time to do things that we want to doreframing positive thoughts improves our experiences, he said. Psychologist Robert Coplan says loneliness and solitude are not the same."

"In fact, University of Michigan researchers who analyzed hundreds of U.S. news stories published between 2020 and 2022, found that negative portrayals and discussions of being alone can contribute to the perception that solitude is harmful. The researchers found that negative beliefs about being alone increased participants' feelings of loneliness. Coplan acknowledges that loneliness can have negative impacts on our mental and physical health, particularly when there's a mismatch between how we would like our social lives to be and how they're actually going."

Holiday schedules often produce concentrated social obligations that leave people needing a break. Spending time in solitude can provide a chance to catch one’s breath and recharge amid busy social calendars. Solitude and loneliness are distinct: loneliness is a negative feeling tied to a mismatch between desired and actual social life, while solitude can enable positive, self-directed experiences. Reframing solitude as a reward or gift and adopting positive thoughts can improve solitude experiences. Negative media portrayals of being alone can increase loneliness, which can harm mental and physical health. A scarcity mentality encourages prioritizing others at personal expense.

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