"DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm worried about my friend's hygiene and that it might have bigger implications. I'm visiting from out of town, and I stayed at his place. After a few days of sightseeing, we decided a sabbatical was in order, so we stayed in for the next three days. I thought it was a healthy choice to relax, binge-watch some movies and indulge in some snacks, but during this time, he didn't shower at all, and the scent was alarming."
"Your friend could simply be a slob. There are people who don't have good hygiene. He certainly is one of them, but he could also have an emotional problem. You do not have the training needed to spot the difference. Because you are concerned, stay in touch with him more. Ask him about his life and his goals. Talk to him about your plans for the future, and encourage him to make some of his own."
A visitor noticed a friend's persistent lack of hygiene, unclean bedding, heavy takeout use, and prolonged inactivity during an extended stay. Such behaviors can result from simple slovenliness or from underlying emotional problems like depression. Nonprofessionals cannot reliably distinguish between habit and mental-health issues. The advised approach is to increase contact, ask about the friend's life and goals, model personal plans, and encourage the friend to adopt healthier routines. Consider returning to check in, challenge the friend about basic self-care, and offer practical, hands-on assistance with cleaning and personal hygiene.
Read at www.mercurynews.com
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