"My teenage years were particularly volatile, largely due to the fact I was hiding my sexuality (I am a lesbian woman who identifies very much as a butch) from my two traditional Catholic parents. Their increasing attempts to feminize me ("for my own good," I was told routinely as they refused to let me cut my hair shorter than my chin, for example) alongside my other spiraling physical and mental health issues caused so many issues between us."
"There are things I wish I wouldn't have done or said to them, but often feel I had no choice but to essentially begin constructing a double life. One, where I got to be myself and explore who I was with the safety of friends, and the other where I did my best to negotiate both keeping myself alive (due to aforementioned health issues) and keep my family from finding out what I was doing."
"Now that I am an adult (almost 28!) I have built myself a life based more on the things that make me happy and bring me my personal fulfillment, including things like dating women (I'm engaged now to the best woman I've ever known) and keeping my hair no longer than my ears. I moved literally to the other side of the country to follow my academic and career dreams, I live with people who love and support me always."
A woman experienced volatile teenage years while hiding her sexuality from two traditional Catholic parents who attempted to feminize her. Physical and mental health struggles compounded family conflict and led her to live a double life, one with friends where she could be herself and another protecting her family from knowing. As an adult, she relocated across the country, pursued academic and career goals, and became engaged to a partner who supports her. Her health and happiness have improved markedly, though she now contends with financial strain while attending graduate school part-time and unable to work full-time.
Read at Slate Magazine
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