"Please choose from the following options. The Basic Plan This is our most popular plan. It covers things like breathing (allowed, no co-pay), sleeping (hint: you must pretend to sleep in order to fall asleep), and eating (you pay for your own food). No other coverage is provided. This is an ideal choice if you are immune to all diseases, and are also immortal."
"The Become-a-Doctor Plan This plan costs sixty grand a year and includes a residency at a local hospital, where you'll learn everything you need to know in order to eventually become the primary-care physician to yourself, and everyone you know. The ChatGPT Plan This one's pretty self-explanatory. In fact, if you want more information about this plan, you should ask ChatGPT. Pro tip: type "please" before your prompts and the large language model turned doctor might give you a better diagnosis."
Several health-care plan options range from minimal to absurd. The Basic Plan covers breathing, sleeping, and eating while excluding other medical needs, and suits the hypothetical immune and immortal individual. The Catastrophic Plan promises celebrity-assisted disaster response limited to general aid in California. The Become-a-Doctor Plan charges $60,000 annually and includes a residency to train subscribers to become their own primary-care physicians. The ChatGPT Plan recommends using an AI for diagnoses and suggests polite prompts. Other options include cartoon medical care, a plan whose terms are hidden, and a naval self-surgery scenario.
Read at The New Yorker
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