Mental health
fromPsychology Today
10 hours agoWhy 'Optimizing' Motherhood Is Destroying Your Mental Health
Constant pressure to optimize motherhood leads to chronic stress and negative health outcomes.
For decades, work was designed around a fiction, that of the 'neutral' worker, an abstract individual assumed to be fully available, consistent, rational, and unaffected by bodily constraints. But this neutrality was never real.
I wanted to create a space where practicing specialists in obstetrics and gynecology could literally drive ourselves to a community that needed practitioners, pop open and see folks the way that we see them in our offices.
Firefighter Jeffrey Jovin, a former paramedic with experience assisting in childbirth, realized the newborn wasn't breathing and had no pulse. Jovin immediately began CPR as another member assisted with ventilation until EMS arrived.
Sofii Lewis described her experience, stating, "I knew I wasn't safe. But I didn't think I was out of control." This highlights the confusion many face with postpartum psychosis.
I attended A&E multiple times complaining of pain, tachycardia (increased heart rate), sickness - I couldn't keep anything down... but they didn't listen. Angel-Kay Mason fell pregnant with her daughter in June 2022 aged 19. Due to a family history of complex pregnancies, she says she was deemed to be high-risk but says she was not referred to a consultant and did not receive any extra scans.
While noting women 'were treated with kindness and compassion', a 'requires improvement' rating was given. Inspectors said hospital management 'did not always support staff well-being' and 'were not always visible within the service and were sometimes perceived as unsupportive'. Staff reported they were confident to report incidents, however, were not always assured action would be taken.
"The smartest women with the happiest relationships are the useless women," Dianna Lee begins in her video. "As you can probably tell, I'm a highly capable woman. I'm capable throughout all areas of my life, through my schooling days, to my career, and I attacked my marriage life in exactly the same way. I just executed. I was fast, efficient, and I knew exactly what needed to get done. And in retrospect, it was so wrong."
We'd been working together for years to make my medication regimen-treatment for schizoaffective disorder-safe for potential pregnancy. Under her care, I was tapering off an antidepressant known to cause respiratory distress and hypertension in a newborn. I'd been experiencing wild mood swings, even suicidal thoughts. My beloved doctor's eyes were sad. "I'm saying no to a pregnancy, Meg." Even in the moment, I understood her priority as a physician was to keep me safe. Still, part of me hated her.
When I first found out I was pregnant, I did what most moms do-I started researching. I wanted to make the best possible choices for my baby and myself, and giving birth in a hospital just didn't feel like the safest option. So many women do it, but the more I learned, the more I realized that the reality of hospital birth in the U.S. is even less reassuring than I had thought. I wanted to birth at home.
Fear of detention or deportation is leading many immigrants to avoid medical appointments, even when those visits are essential. This chilling effect is particularly acute among pregnant individuals, who may delay or forgo prenatal check‑ups out of concern that seeking care could expose them to immigration enforcement. The result is a growing public health crisis: expectant patients are left without consistent medical oversight, and communities face widening disparities in maternal and infant health outcomes.
It's late. I want to go to bed, but instead I'm picking up popsicle sticks and wrappers. I was always taught to leave the place better than I found it. I'm not expecting anyone to fold laundry or scrub floors. But I do expect the mess made during the evening to be taken care of, especially when my kids have been asleep for over two hours.