"Kate tried to remain still as she waited for the decision for the fifth attempt at a protection order from her ex. Her hands trembled as she stared at the judge's face, searching-praying-for any sign of his understanding. "I am denying this request," the judge said. But Kate didn't hear anything after that. A faint mention of "no documented physical assaults this year" floated past her, but the rest disappeared under a heavy, ringing silence."
"Denied? She thought. How can the court not see the endless ways he has punished me for leaving? The threats against my job. The surveillance. The late-night messages reminding me he can ruin my life whenever he chooses. Why is this "not as bad" as physical violence? I'll gladly go back to that if he will leave my children alone! I'll gladly go back to that-anything, anything-if it means he'll stop using the children to hurt me."
Research shows that systems frequently fail survivors when abusers hold social, financial, or professional power. Abusers' wealth and influence can obstruct protection orders, exploit legal loopholes, and influence community and institutional responses. Victims often lack funds for legal defense, face aggressive opposing attorneys, and encounter narrow legal definitions that prioritize documented physical assault over patterns of coercion and harassment. The emotional and practical toll includes fear for children, job threats, surveillance, and relentless intimidation. Effective protection requires both legal reform to close loopholes and cultural change to recognize non-physical forms of abuse and counter power imbalances.
Read at Psychology Today
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