"Honestly, it had barely anything to do with my partner or the marriage. Sure, he had his moments, but overall, he was a great husband, friend, and father. The problem wasn't not loving him; it was not loving ME. Once I got a taste of the validation of being 'adored,' I was hooked. It was like an addiction; I knew I needed to quit, but just couldn't get over it."
"Misplaced feelings. I wanted love and physical touch, but my partner had checked out of that 12 months prior. I'd spoken to her many times about why, and if there was anything I could do. The conversations always led to nothing. I should have taken the initiative and ended it there, but instead, I stuck it out - which turned out to essentially just be sharing a rent bill."
"From my experience, affairs don't just happen by accident; they're led by something. In hindsight, I was incredibly unhappy for years. An affair wasn't the solution, but it was a little bit of happiness in an otherwise very lonely time in my life."
Individuals who have cheated on their partners reveal complex motivations beyond simple relationship dissatisfaction. Common themes include seeking validation and emotional fulfillment missing from their primary relationship, unmet physical and emotional intimacy needs, and personal identity struggles. Many describe affairs as symptomatic of deeper unhappiness rather than the root cause. Some acknowledge that direct communication about relationship issues failed to produce change, leading them to seek connection elsewhere. Respondents frequently express guilt and recognize that infidelity was not a solution but rather a temporary escape from loneliness. Several emphasize that affairs typically stem from pre-existing relationship dysfunction or personal emotional voids rather than occurring randomly.
#infidelity-motivations #relationship-dissatisfaction #emotional-needs #personal-validation #relationship-dysfunction
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