"Try to create a story or movie scene out of it. Think about this scenario from start to finish with all of the details. Have your partner do the same. Take turns sharing the explicit details about how turned on you are, what exactly would happen, what you would both do to each other, and you'd be wearing, as if you're telling a story from a dirty book or watching a movie scene."
"We know from the research of Rosemary Basson that often, especially for women, desire is responsive, not spontaneous. This means that willingness and being open and receptive to a sexual experience is key. When you are receptive to sexual stimulation ― having your hair stroked, body caressed, kissing ― more often than not, the body responds, and it's through arousal that desire kicks in."
Watching each other masturbate and directing a sex scene encourages explicit communication of fantasies and increases arousal through imaginative detail. Focusing on oral sex without expecting orgasm shifts attention to the sexual buildup and the pleasures of sustained stimulation. Emphasizing receptivity to touch, kissing, and caressing leverages responsive desire, where openness to stimulation often produces desire. Developing a signature move and repeating favored acts with slight variation or in new environments creates anticipation and memorable erotic cues. Vocalizing specific desires and practicing playful objectification can introduce novelty and revive connection in long-term relationships.
Read at HuffPost
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