"She asked if she could explore these feelings, which to me was essentially asking permission to be physically intimate with her. I had mixed feelings. Our sex life has had its ups and downs and has been generally satisfactory, but we'd recently gone through a hot streak where we were watching girl-on-girl porn. The thought of my wife with another woman makes me insanely turned on."
"A year later, I happened to see her texts between her and her friend: "I love you so much; I love you too, babe." I got very suspicious and confronted her, and she admitted that she had had a few trysts with her friend over the past several months. I was crushed and furious-it wasn't just cheating, they were making love and were clearly in a deeply intimate physical and emotional relationship."
A couple near 50 have been married 17 years and generally love each other deeply. The wife revealed attraction to her female best friend and asked to explore it physically; the husband declined because he anticipated intense jealousy. Later the husband discovered affectionate texts and learned the wife had several sexual trysts with her friend, which felt like deep emotional and physical intimacy and left him crushed and furious. They began therapy; the wife says she loves her husband, is possibly polyamorous rather than lesbian, and loves both people differently. The husband struggles with jealousy, trust, and mixed feelings of repulsion and arousal.
Read at Slate Magazine
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