I've Started Secretly Checking My Wife's Bedside Drawer. She's Keeping Something Big From Me.

"I am a straight male, in my mid-60s, and married to a straight female in her mid-50s. We've been married for about 20 years, and have always had a very happy and successful relationship. Even now, we are still very physically active, healthy, and, I think, attractive. Our sex life in the past has always been passionate and intense. She has pretty much always been a twice-a-week girl, whereas I would love it every day, but she has always been wonderful in keeping me happy. Often, we would masturbate beside one another, something that is a huge turn-on for me."

"However, we're now dealing with menopause, and she has apparently had a significant drop in her interest in sex with me. We are down to once every two to six weeks. She's been kind in explaining this to me, and I've assured her that she's worth the wait. I wouldn't consider being with anyone else and don't feel the need. But there are a few things that are bothering me. Number one: We used to be open and frank with one another when it came to discussing our sex life. She no longer wishes to talk about sex with me. Number two: Lately, she only wants plain, missionary-style sex. She doesn't even want me to go down on her, which is something I absolutely love doing. Number three: She bought a new toy a few years ago, and it's pretty awesome. When she bought it, she told me she could cum in 30 seconds with it. I was excited by this, but she wouldn't use it in my presence for some reason. In the past, she would use all kinds of toys while we played together."

A straight man in his mid-60s is married to a woman in her mid-50s and has been in a happy, stable marriage for about 20 years. Both remain physically active, healthy, and find each other attractive. Their past sexual life was passionate and frequent, with the wife typically wanting sex twice weekly while the husband desired daily encounters. Mutual masturbation and shared toy use were previously common and arousing. Menopause has led to a marked decline in the wife's sexual interest, reducing frequency to once every two to six weeks. She now avoids talking about sex, prefers plain missionary intercourse, and refuses oral sex or using toys in his presence, while he remains committed and not interested in other partners.

Read at Slate Magazine