"Should you avoid hook-ups because some guy tossed you in a closet to hide his cheating and then revealed that he was on his honeymoon? By that logic, you should never cross the street (you might get hit by a car!) or buy organic lettuce because it might have a frog in it. You take your chances when you get intimate with strangers. Sometimes it goes great. Sometimes it doesn't."
"If you don't like those fuzzy odds or if the drama isn't worth the play, maybe hook-ups aren't for you. Avoiding them is certainly one way to declutter your life. Part of their excitement is that they're unpredictable. Those who like controlled environments, or just control period, would be better off not getting naked with strangers. When you invite someone into your life, particularly to get this close to your face and other parts, you are playing with wild cards."
A person met a man at a work-retreat hotel pool and ended up having intense sex with him. The man abruptly checked his phone, dragged the person out of bed, shoved clothes into their hands, and hid them in a closet when his husband arrived. He sent the husband away under the pretense of buying chocolates and later admitted he was on his honeymoon. The person left, contemplated telling the husband, but avoided confrontation out of fear for personal safety and embarrassment. Casual hookups entail taking chances with strangers; sometimes they are great, and sometimes they produce drama, unsafe situations, or emotional fallout. Those who prefer control or predictability may choose to avoid hookups and pursue safer, more controlled environments for intimacy.
Read at Slate Magazine
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