"He constantly stares at other women. I've talked with him about a five-second rule, but he doesn't hear me. He told me he was raised by his mother and grandmother and that's why he's attracted to women in general. He says it doesn't mean anything. I have never been with a man who constantly looks at other women. He also prefers to have women friends rather than men friends."
"RED FLAG IN CALIFORNIA DEAR RED FLAG: If this person makes you feel less good about yourself, recognize it is a red flag. His behavior is insensitive and rude. Because you have asked him to stop staring at women when he is with you and he makes excuses to continue, my advice is to find a companion who is more considerate of your feelings."
"The thing is, when he sleeps, almost every night, he says her name and how much he loves her. He says because he's doing it in his sleep, he doesn't know he's doing it. It seems to upset him that I'm upset. He doesn't want to hurt me. What can I do to deal with it or get him to stop doing it?"
A senior widow has been dating an older man whose constant staring at other women causes her jealousy and discomfort. He deflects her concern, citing upbringing and general attraction, and prefers female friendships. The behavior persists despite her request that he stop. Advice given is that behavior that makes a partner feel diminished is a red flag and merits leaving in favor of a more considerate companion. Separately, a woman reports her husband speaks an old girlfriend's name in his sleep, reflecting long-term attachment; she is advised to gently wake him and focus on the present relationship.
Read at www.mercurynews.com
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