"This is problematic for a few reasons. One is that I often have confidential information about parishioners on my desk sometimes, notes on financial aid we've given or notes on a pastoral counseling situation. These things are not lying out in the open, but my spouse will come into the office and, as she talks, will casually flip through paperwork on my desk. It's not cool."
"Put a lock on the door. If you've got confidential material in the office, it's probably a good idea for it to be secured, anyway. I'm a little hazy about why she has so much access to the office is she coming from home to the church on a regular basis? Or do you also live at the church? Either way, it's simply not communal married property; it belongs to your job. She can respect that or she can learn how to pick a lock."
A clergy person cherishes a private office used for most work but reports a spouse repeatedly entering, moving items, storing belongings, and criticizing decor. Confidential parishioner records, financial-aid notes and counseling notes sometimes sit on the desk and are casually handled by the spouse during visits. Repeated polite requests have provoked defensiveness and arguments. A practical step is to install a lock to secure confidential materials because the office is part of the job, not communal married property. The spouse's behavior signals disrespect for the clergy role and parishioner privacy, risking both church integrity and the marriage; marriage counseling is advised.
Read at www.mercurynews.com
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