"I'm a 47-year-old guy who has been with my wife, who is 44, for 12 years. Six years ago, we made the decision to uproot ourselves from city life and buy acreage. We had long discussions about what this would entail the work it needs, maintenance, et cetera. My wife was very keen on the idea, and she assured me that she would be helping with all that the property requires."
"It may not be within your power to change your wife, and that's not your responsibility. There's something that's not being said between you, perhaps from both sides. You need to find a way to talk about it. The best path is marriage counseling. You might go into it with a specific question. I'd suggest that the question be Is this home still the right place for us? Right now, the acreage is an albatross,"
A couple moved from the city to acreage six years ago after long discussions about required labor and maintenance. The wife had assured she would help with property needs but has scarcely contributed; the husband performs most outdoor labor and much of the household tasks while both work full-time. The wife spends time on internet games, withdraws when approached, and derides attempts to encourage healthier habits. The husband has health concerns and is becoming worn down. Marriage counseling focused on whether the home suits both partners can provide a neutral space for honest conversation and decisions.
Read at www.mercurynews.com
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