Psychology says the people who feel like they're falling behind in life are usually holding themselves to a timeline that was never theirs to begin with - Silicon Canals

"Developmental psychology has long studied what researchers call 'social clocks,' a term coined by psychologist Bernice Neugarten in the 1960s. Neugarten's research found that societies create implicit timetables for major life events: when you should finish school, when you should be established in a career, when you should have children, when you should own property. People who hit these milestones 'on time' reported less stress."

"The distress wasn't coming from real deprivation. It was coming from perceived deviation. The clock itself was the source of pain. And here's what makes this particularly insidious in 2025: the social clock used to be set by your local community. Your parents, your neighbors, the people at your church or your town. Now it's set by the entire internet."

Ambitious people commonly experience a pervasive anxiety about falling behind an invisible schedule, despite being satisfied with their actual lives. Psychological research on social clocks reveals that societies create implicit timetables for major life events like career establishment, marriage, and property ownership. People who deviate from these perceived schedules report significant psychological distress regardless of their objective quality of life. The source of suffering is perceived deviation from an internalized timeline rather than real deprivation. Historically, social clocks were set by local communities, but modern technology has expanded these reference points globally, intensifying comparison and the feeling of lateness among ambitious individuals.

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