"These are the black sheep that some parents seek therapy to "fix." However, the issue usually lies in the family dynamic itself, not the individual child, Annie Wright, a licensed marriage and family therapist in California, told Business Insider. "There's a family systems issue, but they're pointing to one person as the scapegoat," Wright said. Behind the scenes, one spouse could be having an affair, the parents could be having explosive fights, and the marriage could be breaking down."
"Scapegoats don't always feel like they're underachieving in the family. Some might feel the opposite: in a family that enforces more rigid gender roles, Wright said, you might be the black sheep if you're the first woman to go to college or work as a CEO. The point is that scapegoats don't fit in. They're usually "the person who acts antithetical to the norms of the family," she said. Simply doing things differently can get you branded as a family outsider."
A family scapegoat takes on blame for broader family problems and often becomes the black sheep who does not fit established family norms. Scapegoating reflects a family systems issue where one person is singled out while underlying marital or parental dysfunction persists. Scapegoats can appear as underachievers or as outliers who succeed differently, such as being the first woman to attend college or holding unconventional roles. Scapegoats may oscillate between rebellion and people-pleasing and hold the unconscious collective burden of the family's dysfunction. Doing things differently can trigger labeling as an outsider.
Read at Business Insider
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