"Every October, parents suddenly find themselves fighting with their kids about candy rules. While parents worry about Halloween candy hurting their kids' health, the real problem isn't what happens when you eat too much candy. It's the fights that rip through families faster than kids can open a "Fun Size" Snickers. We worry about what too much sugar does to our kids' bodies, while our kids only see us being "mean" or "unfair.""
"We want to keep them safe, but our rules often blow up in our faces and create sneaking behavior, or at the very least, a lot of arguments. Halloween candy fights happen when parents and kids have different underlying needs. Children have a need for autonomy-they want some control over their own choices. They find candy delicious and want to indulge in treats they enjoy. They also have a need for belonging and inclusion, especially when they see friends freely enjoying-and maybe even trading-Halloween treats."
Parents and children often clash over Halloween candy because their needs differ: children seek autonomy, pleasure, and belonging, while parents seek competence in protecting health and household harmony. Excess sugar produces constipation and energy crashes more commonly than hyperactivity, and research indicates sugar is not addictive like drugs or alcohol. Overly strict candy rules frequently provoke sneaking behavior and binge eating at social events. Fear of harm drives parental control, but the underlying goal is confidence that children will be okay and that family life can proceed with greater ease.
Read at Psychology Today
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