"I used to think I had so much time to enjoy my kids. So many more holidays and birthdays and Sunday dinners. Life was busy when my three kids were teens. I was sometimes too busy to even catch my breath. I poured myself into my kids as their mother, and now that they are gone, I have zero regrets. I'd do it all over again if I had the chance... and man, do I wish I had the chance."
"You know what no one said? No one told me how to prepare for it. How to go about my life when my three kids left. I somehow thought I'd know exactly what to do, but I didn't. It was such a weird time. Sure, the freedom was nice, but I wasn't sure what my purpose was anymore, and I wasn't prepared for the giant void it left that went way beyond missing my kids. I missed who I used to be. Deeply."
Parents often underestimate how quickly the household dynamics change when children leave and may be unprepared for the sudden surplus of time and quiet. Daily tasks like shopping and cooking decrease, leaving routines that once defined days suddenly gone. Emotional effects include a profound sense of loss, a void beyond missing children, and mourning the previous self. Establishing new activities, hobbies, classes, or volunteer work while children are still at home creates an easier transition. Developing routines beforehand helps fill time and purpose. Allowing oneself time to adjust supports redefining identity and enjoying newfound freedom.
Read at Scary Mommy
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