"Their first separation at birth and in their early months of life should be carefully monitored, as their sense of self is intertwined with their co-twin, sharing their mother's womb, and sharing many days together since birth. People question whether infant twins are one. My answer is: "No, no, they are two individuals physically. Emotionally, they are connected in many ways and may appear to be one.""
"Only gradually, with physical experiences apart from each other, do twins develop a sense of individuality. Because they cannot explain themselves as infants or even as toddlers, we cannot know when twins realize that they are two different people. My best guess is that hitting the other twin, pulling their hair, or biting helps the twin understand that they are not attached; the co-twin is an eerily similar but different human being."
Twins begin life extremely close, with identities intertwined due to shared prenatal and early postnatal experiences. The first separations at birth and during early months require careful monitoring because twins often respond as if they are one person. Individuality emerges gradually through physical experiences apart, and sometimes through aggressive interactions that reveal separateness. The twin bond provides comfort but makes physical separation stressful, producing long-lasting separation anxiety. Teen years bring dramatic identity shifts and alter the twin bond. In later life, many twins revert to a relationship resembling their early closeness. Thoughtful parental management of separations fosters tolerance for being apart.
Read at Psychology Today
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