My Daughter Wants to Move Home After College. I Said OK-With One Condition. Her Reaction is Off the Wall.

A 22-year-old graduate finished college with no tuition debt but still has a car loan. Parents paid rent and half of tuition during college and now ask about job plans and housing after the lease ends. The daughter says she has not found a job and has not been looking because she plans to move back home for a “gap year” before taking a real job. Parents propose $200 monthly rent plus a share of groceries and household tasks. The daughter objects, saying she cannot afford rent and the car loan on a part-time job and calling the expectations unfair. Family members also criticize the parents’ approach. Parents believe the rent is fair compared with local one-bedroom costs and want guidance on whether to allow rent-free living until a real job is found.

"We paid for her apartment rent and half of her tuition while she was going to college, so she graduated with no college debt. Her only debt is for her car loan. The past few months we have asked her multiple times if she has found a job and what her plans are when her apartment lease is up at the start of the summer. Her answer has either been "none of your business" or "don't worry about it.""

"She finally told us this week she hasn't found a job yet and really hasn't been looking because she plans on moving back home and taking a "gap year" before getting a "real job." We told her if she moves back home that rent will be $200 per month and she will be responsible for a fourth of the grocery bill along with mowing the yard and taking the trash out. If it makes any difference, she graduated with an accounting degree, so finding a job in her field is not an issue."

"She said she can't afford that amount of rent and her car loan while working only at a part-time job. She also said how mean it is of us not only to be charging her rent but expecting her to jump into the workforce right away without taking a break from college. I guess the five months between December and May doesn't count as a break? Now she has her aunts (my wife's sisters) and her grandma also agreeing with her on how bad we are treating her with these expectations."

"We think we are being fair by only charging her $200/month for rent, as a one-bedroom apartment runs about $850 in our area. What are your thoughts? Do people take a "gap year" after graduating from college nowadays? Should we be letting her live rent free until she gets a "real job"?"

Read at Slate Magazine