"To answer your question, no, I don't think you have to reciprocate in kind. But let me hit you with this: Do you actually like this person? It seems like you do! If you do, you could always acknowledge her kids' birthdays to create a closer friendship with her. Doesn't have to be a gift! A card from your kid? A balloon? Grocery store cupcakes? Just something to acknowledge the day."
"But if this is strictly a cordial work relationship, save your money, set some boundaries, and don't stress about hurting your co-workers' feelings here. Sometimes people do things because they want to be kind and don't expect anything at all in return."
A parent received an extravagant birthday gift from a new coworker for their 3-year-old son and wondered whether they should reciprocate by giving gifts to the coworker's four older children. The advice clarifies that reciprocation is not necessary. However, if the parent genuinely likes the coworker and wants to deepen the friendship, small acknowledgments of the coworker's children's birthdays—such as cards, balloons, or store-bought cupcakes—are appropriate alternatives to gifts. If the relationship is purely cordial and professional, the parent should set boundaries and not feel pressured to reciprocate, as the coworker's gift was likely given out of kindness without expectation of return.
Read at Slate Magazine
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