"If you're the mom who asks the host of a children's birthday party if your other kid can tag along with their invited sibling, this mom wants to know: "Why do you think that's OK?" "I'm never going to ask that question and make another parent feel uncomfortable," Brittany Stuit, the mom of 11-year-old quadruplets (two boys and two girls), tells TODAY.com."
"Most parents who make the ask aren't trying to be rude or inconvenience party hosts - if you don't have childcare and your kid is too young for a drop-off party, it's a logistics issue. Other parents may ask because they don't want their other children to feel left out. Some parents who attend with their other children, also bring extra gifts or pay for their own admission, if the venue calls for it."
"Others encouraged her to ask the host if she could bring the uninvited child, but Stuit refused. "I would never, in the history of time, ever do that - I have always said my kids are not a package deal. You can invite one without inviting the others," Stuit said in a TikTok video captioned: "Am I the crazy one that thinks it's incredibly rude to ask the host if you can invite a sibling?""
"Stuit says she believes that bringing an extra child to a party burdens the host and robs kids of experiencing the inevitability of life's disappointments. At best, she says, the pressure to invite all four of her kids could halt invitations altogether. Stuit has firsthand experience: Recently, one of her daughters was invited to a party and the other was not. Others encouraged her to ask the host if she could bring the uninvited child, but Stuit refused."
Parents sometimes ask hosts if an uninvited sibling can attend due to childcare needs, a child's age, or to avoid hurt feelings. Some parents offer extra gifts or pay admission when bringing additional children. Brittany Stuit, mother of 11-year-old quadruplets, refuses to ask for extra invitations and says her children are not a package deal. Stuit believes bringing an extra child burdens the host and prevents children from learning to handle disappointment. She worries that pressure to invite all siblings could lead hosts to stop inviting her family. Asking about extra attendees can be awkward, especially between acquaintances.
Read at TODAY.com
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