"Teenagers, including my own two (almost three), are known for their one-word replies to parent inquiries, whether it be in text or in person. My kids are no exception. They often shut themselves into their bedrooms or bury their heads in a screen when I want to talk to them. Unsurprisingly, communication isn't their strongest suit. Like many parents, I found myself frustrated."
"Whether I've noticed something negative or positive, my kids tend to communicate more when I share a simple observation. Recently, I approached one of my teens and said, "I've noticed your grades have been dropping lately." By stating what I observed, while taking ownership of my own observation, I was able to confront them about something they could have very easily taken the wrong way. I was trying to cut down on any defensiveness."
A parent changed conversational approach with teens by using 'I' statements to reduce defensiveness and elicit fuller responses. Teenagers frequently give one-word replies, withdraw to bedrooms, or focus on screens, making communication difficult. The parent observed changes in grades and opened a conversation by stating an observation such as I've noticed your grades have been dropping lately. Taking ownership of the observation and avoiding accusatory language reduced confrontational reactions. Following the observation with additional 'I' statements encouraged dialogue and fostered connection and parental guidance during adolescent development.
Read at Business Insider
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