Why Your Team Sucks 2025: Detroit Lions | Defector
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Why Your Team Sucks 2025: Detroit Lions | Defector
"The nation has never loved the Lions they way they loved them last year, and this includes all the Thanksgivings when the weather was lousy and you were stuck inside looking for something to watch. The Lions were the one football thing most folks could agree upon, even if it was "What's my second favorite team after the shitheads closest to me geographically?""
"They were the certified triumph of the meathead class because of Campbell, the jutjawed cartoon who had lifted the concept of Honolulu blue from the dustbin of history to the finest uniform in all the land, made all the better by the 53 people filling them. They repaired QB Jared Goff. They found RT Penei Sewell, made him the best lineman on either side of the ball in the entire sport, and even gave him a chance to throw the ball."
The Detroit Lions finished the 2024 regular season 15-3, earning unprecedented national attention and broad popular affection. Dan Campbell's persona and the team's Honolulu blue uniforms became cultural symbols while Jared Goff's turnaround and Penei Sewell's dominance anchored the roster. The Lions fielded exceptional depth at running back, inventive playcalling, and an offensive and defensive performance that produced the most complete statistical team since 1970. A shocking 5-0 playoff loss to Dallas erased much of the postseason promise and left the season's narrative unresolved despite an 11-game winning streak and lopsided victories.
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