"Anger is a core emotion that's pre-wired in the brain. Core emotions tell us what we need and what is good for us. For example, fear (another core emotion) prompts us to seek safety, while sadness tells us there's something to mourn. Anger shows up when we feel violated. This is why feeling wronged, like when our kids repeatedly push back or yell at us, can evoke it."
"Research shows that pushing down our anger can lead to symptoms of depression and anxiety. It can also make the emotion roar louder. This is why it's important for parents to get to know their anger and understand its true purpose."
"Our relationship with anger begins in childhood. It starts with how our parents respond to our anger (and their own) from day one. If a child is repeatedly told that anger means they're mean, or if they're repeatedly hurt (physically or emotionally) or shamed for feeling outraged, they will unknowingly learn to 'defend' against this core emotion."
Anger is a pre-wired core emotion that signals when boundaries are violated and helps parents enforce limits and speak up for themselves. Societal messages often frame anger as problematic, leading parents to suppress it—a response rooted in childhood trauma and parental modeling. When anger is repeatedly shamed or punished in childhood, people develop defensive mechanisms like self-blame and perfectionism to protect themselves from this unbearable emotion. Suppressing anger creates long-term distress, including depression and anxiety symptoms, and intensifies the emotion itself. Understanding anger's true purpose and validating it rather than pushing it down allows parents to access calm and supports emotional flourishing.
#parental-anger-management #childhood-trauma-and-emotions #core-emotions-and-boundaries #emotional-suppression-effects
Read at Psychology Today
Unable to calculate read time
Collection
[
|
...
]