"I honestly still don't understand why this war started, why it continues, and how, when and at what cost it could be brought to an end. To me, war is something archaic, a return to the logic of brute force, at a time when humanity is talking about colonizing Mars. When the war reached my homeland, I, a man who had never held a weapon in my hand, was faced with the choice of remaining a spectator or helping defend my country."
"My decision to join the army has less to do with a sense of duty than with the desire to have agency, rather than become a subject of history. It was about the right not to become a victim of circumstances. Over time, the war lost its abstract nature for me and became deeply personal. It has become a routine, a part of my everyday life."
"I can no longer imagine what it's like to live any other way. I'm pained by the friends who are gone and the places of my past that have been laid to waste. I see what is happening in front-line cities. But I am particularly worried when Kyiv is attacked, writing my loved ones after every bombardment, asking them, "How are you? Do you have electricity? Is your home without heating?""
A person left previous work in 2022 to join Ukraine's volunteer army after the Russian invasion. The decision sprang from a desire for agency rather than passive victimhood. War felt archaic and incongruous with modern aspirations, yet it became deeply personal and a daily routine. The person experiences ongoing grief for lost friends and destroyed places and worries about loved ones during attacks on Kyiv. Ukrainian forces face persistent institutional and operational problems that are wearing down front-line fighters. Those problems, rather than cowardice, are driving worrying trends among soldiers and volunteers.
Read at www.dw.com
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