"For 22 years, I was a military wife, putting aside my needs to support my husband's career - all for the promise that after retirement, when our children were grown, we'd travel the world together. In 2018, retirement finally came, and not long after, our nearly 25-year marriage crumbled. When his military career ended, it felt like he lost his sense of purpose. I tried to hold things together, but the unhappiness and bitter fights left me drowning, too."
"It wasn't love that kept me there, but fear. I came from a toxic home and no longer had contact with my family, so I worried that without my husband and children, I'd have no one. That fear kept me complacent until the pain of staying was greater than the fear of leaving. Our divorce was finalized in February of 2022, and just before, I had moved to Hawaii to stay with a recently widowed woman."
"I gave myself a year to heal It was time to figure out who I was on my own. I walked for exercise, but over time it became an act of penance. Some days I covered more than 12 miles, each step bringing realizations about my marriage and myself. I realized that I'd been a people-pleaser who sacrificed my own needs for others, only to resent them for it."
She served as a military wife for 22 years, sidelining her needs to support her husband's career and expecting travel together after his retirement. Retirement in 2018 coincided with the breakdown of their nearly 25-year marriage as he lost his sense of purpose and unhappiness led to bitter fights. Fear of loneliness and a toxic family background delayed leaving until the pain of staying outweighed the fear of leaving. Divorce finalized in February 2022. She moved to Hawaii, gave herself a year to heal through long walks, therapy, reading, and female friendships, stayed close to her sons, and booked a solo flight to Bangkok despite limited savings and nervousness.
Read at Business Insider
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