"While goals can create structure in your life, give you something to strive for, and even inspire you, reaching the goal itself is a result of what you do to get there. The actions you take are the process-how you're actually filling the time that is your life. Sometimes, if you're lucky, what you do is fulfilling; it brings out the best in you-your talents, interests, and skills."
"Goals can come with expectations that are often set by others. They can shape and lock you into a lifestyle you did not choose, but have learned to accept. The alternative: Build your way of life Rather than starting with goals, begin with your vision of the life you want to live. What is that ideal mix of family, couple, and individual time? What are activities that you enjoy and look forward to, what makes you feel alive, happy, that make a good life?"
Goals can provide structure and motivation, but outcomes are consequences of daily actions and processes. Examples show that pursuing promotion or homeownership can demand sacrifices—long hours or jobs that conflict with personal interests—because expectations and conventional metrics often dictate goals. Goals may lock individuals into lifestyles they did not deliberately choose. An alternative is to design the desired way of life first by envisioning an ideal day or week, identifying preferred mixes of family, couple, and individual time, and prioritizing activities that bring energy and meaning. Focusing on the process and lifestyle enables intentional choices and control before external expectations shape priorities.
Read at Psychology Today
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