You Are Probably Not a 'Porn Addict'

"In my practice, I see many young men who claim to be "addicted" to online porn. This notion of being an addict carries a lot of negative connotation and stigma, as well as a sense of inevitability that creates obstacles to change and growth. After assessment and some treatment work, most young men I see don't fall into severe categories of addiction. Most use porn problematically, in a way that interferes with their aspirational sex life."

"Language matters in the treatment of all therapeutic material. When someone identifies as an 'addict,' the term carries all its weighted connotations. Following the popular 12-step model for alcohol, 'addicts' often see their affliction as a 'disease' that is inherent to who they are. Their struggle against addiction becomes lifelong, something they must always remain vigilant about-where one drop of alcohol could return them to the worst days of addiction."

Many young men report being 'addicted' to online porn; assessment often finds problematic use that interferes with their aspirational sex life rather than severe addiction. The label 'addict' brings stigma, a sense of inevitability, and binary thinking modeled on substance 12-step frameworks. Substance addiction framing encourages lifelong vigilance and abstinence goals that are not appropriate for sexual desire. Sexual concerns typically require modifying and managing drives rather than eradication. Therapeutic language should avoid deterministic addiction terminology. An 'erotic conflict' framework that addresses competing and contradictory desires better supports client and couple work, enabling change without reinforcing crippling stigma.

Read at Psychology Today