What My Recovery Has Taught Me About Seasonal Depression

"Walking home from work yesterday, it was cold and dark at 5 pm. My house was bedecked with a Christmas tree in the window, and I paused to look at it, at the glowing lights and the front door with garlands. It looked so lovely. And I thought, "I am depressed again." I'm Dana, and I'm an alcoholic, and I struggle with depression."

"I drank because I was depressed. And I was depressed because I was drinking. This lovely dance went on for a long time, until I got sober more than a decade ago. Depression still exists in my life, and I have come to realize that there are seasonal triggers that exacerbate it. I try to prepare, but depression likes to blanket preparedness and healthy perspectives in a mind-numbing sort of dread. It's hard to think straight with dread. Dread is pretty powerful stuff."

An individual with more than a decade of sobriety continues to experience persistent depression that intensifies during the holiday season. Seasonal triggers and pervasive dread can overwhelm preparedness and healthy coping strategies. The person describes returning to a warmly decorated home and feeling disconnected from surrounding cheer while pets react joyfully. Psychiatric care, medication, and spiritual work provide meaningful support but do not fully prevent holiday-related frustration. Depression disregards social cues and can persist despite conscious efforts to avoid it. Nostalgic memories of past drinking during holidays can trigger painful, bitter reflections that compound seasonal low moods.

Read at Psychology Today