How Self-Compassion Heals Muslim LGBTQ Identity Conflict

"Many Muslim families struggle when a child comes out as LGBTQ. Some respond with silence, fear, or rejection, believing they must choose faith over love. Yet this belief is not Islamic. It goes against the essence of Islam, which is mercy and justice. When religion is used to justify cruelty, it loses its soul. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) is described as Rahmat al-lil Alameen, a mercy to all worlds."

"As a psychotherapist, I see the emotional and spiritual wounds this rejection causes. Family rejection is one of the deepest forms of trauma. Research from the Family Acceptance Project at San Francisco State University shows that LGBTQ youth who face high levels of family rejection are eight times more likely to attempt suicide and nearly six times more likely to experience depression. Those who are accepted, even if their families struggle to understand, show stronger self-worth, lower stress, and a deeper spiritual connection."

"The Quran begins almost every chapter with Bismillah-ir-Rahman-ir-Rahim, in the name of God, the Most Compassionate, the Most Merciful. These words remind us that mercy is not an afterthought. It is the foundation of faith. The Quran teaches believers to "lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy" toward their parents and children (17:24). To disown a child for who they are breaks this sacred command."

Many Muslim families respond to an LGBTQ child's disclosure with silence, fear, or rejection, treating faith as requiring exclusion rather than compassion. Islam's core values are mercy, justice, and love, exemplified by the Prophet described as Rahmat al‑lil Alameen and the Quranic invocation Bismillah‑ir‑Rahman‑ir‑Rahim. The Quran instructs believers to lower the wing of humility toward parents and children, and disowning a child violates that command. Family rejection causes deep emotional and spiritual wounds and increases risks of depression and suicide, while acceptance fosters self‑worth, lower stress, and stronger spiritual connection. Many LGBTQ Muslims hide their identities, creating chronic shame and isolation.

Read at Psychology Today