"Before they become historical documents, diaries start out as ordinary ledgers, a frame-by-frame accounting of the moments and events of a person's days. With the help of time, scholarship, and critical interest, they become history in miniature, an up-close look at how a life was formed and shaped by the times the diarist lived in. One could read Randy Shilts's monumental 1987 history And the Band Played On: Politics, People, and the AIDS Epidemic to learn about the infuriating and chaotic early history of the crisis:"
""Every day people walk down Fifth Avenue past dozens and dozens of men who are HIV+, on AZT, and fighting steadily for their lives," Thomas Mallon wrote in his diary on March 5, 1991. "They are a city within a city, and they are invisible." Mallon's AIDS-era diaries, The Very Heart of It: New York Diaries, 1983-1994, capture this invisible city in an uncertain and frightening moment. The journals are the detailed daily accounting of a young, hopeful gay man finding his way as a professional during the AIDS crisis. Many of the entries are snapshots of a vibrant life situated too closely to death, of someone fighting to keep his spirit alive during the plague years."
""We've all been exposed, we're all living under the sword, & I'm not more lethal than anyone else," Mallon wrote in 1985. "We're either going to get it or not. Period.""
Diaries begin as ordinary ledgers that record moments and events and, with time and scholarly attention, become miniature histories revealing how lives were shaped by their eras. Personal journals provide an intimate counterpoint to political and scientific histories by showing daily human responses to crises. Thomas Mallon's New York diaries chronicle the invisible presence of HIV-positive men in the city, the precariousness of everyday life, and the effort to sustain spirit and creativity amid loss and fear. The entries offer vivid snapshots of social networks, medical realities, and the emotional labor of surviving the AIDS years.
Read at The Nation
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