"Time for your weekly edition of the Defector Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. You can also read Drew over at , and buy Drew's books while you're at it. Today, we're talking about football, auto wipers, road trips, and more. Whoa hey, I'm back! Let's see what happened while I was away. Well, my family and I went to Germany for the holidays, only for me to immediately come down with a case of the barfing flu."
"Anyway, I'm back now and ready to give you only my finest, worst opinions. But before I do, let's give a bigass round of applesauce to all of the guest hosts that covered for me here, and over at the Jamboroo, while I was gone: Albert Burneko, Brandy Jansen, and Matt Ufford. These people are the REAL Santa's little helpers."
"But let's say you've got some quality pico de gallo lying around. Or maybe you've even got the Frontera fire-roasted tomato salsa-best in category if you ask me-that you can throw onto that bad boy. I think I'd be all right with that. I like salsa, and I like enough dressing on my salad to render that salad a nutritional liability."
Returned from Germany for the holidays and immediately fell ill with vomiting flu. Family stranded in Frankfurt for two days after a missed flight connection, prompting a split into separate traveling parties to return stateside. Mention of bombing of Venezuela is included. Guest hosts Albert Burneko, Brandy Jansen, and Matt Ufford received thanks. Intention to offer blunt, comedic opinions on football, auto wipers, road trips, and food is stated. Debate about using salsa as salad dressing emphasizes differences between jarred salsas and quality pico de gallo or Frontera fire-roasted tomato salsa.
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