Parvati Shallow's memoir, Nice Girls Don't Win, delves into her challenging upbringing in a Florida commune led by Ma Jaya Bhagavati. The book details abusive practices within the commune, including violent meditations and schemes for adopting children. Shallow narrates her journey from a seemingly supportive community to a coercive environment and her family's eventual escape. Despite past traumas, including a difficult marriage and the loss of her brother, she emphasizes insights gained from motherhood and spirituality, showcasing her resilience and survival instinct throughout her experiences.
Shallow describes all-night meditations in which Ma kicked or slapped anyone who fell asleep; a period of time called 'the Rampage' when Ma became more abusive, and a lot more violent.
Shallow looks back on how her parents met in the commune; how a community that first felt supportive turned coercive; and how her family eventually escaped to start a new life.
Her difficult upbringing made her a natural survivor. Although she ended her traumatic marriage with Survivor: Samoa contestant John Fincher in 2021, she cherishes their daughter, Ama.
In mourning her brother Kaelan, who died of an accidental overdose in 2009, she found a deeper connection to her spirituality.
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