Relationships
fromPsychology Today
1 day agoThe Loneliness of Being in Love with a Narcissist
Romantic relationships with narcissists often lead to loneliness and an imbalance in perceived value between partners.
#obsessive-love
#obsessive-love
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#relationships #psychology #mental-health #communication #friendship #romantic-relationships #loneliness #intimacy
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
21 hours agoPsychology says the people who find it hardest to be taken care of when they're sick aren't independent, they're carrying a very old belief that needing someone was the fastest way to be left - Silicon Canals
Needing care from loved ones during illness can evoke feelings of vulnerability and discomfort, often rooted in deeper fears of abandonment.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoPsychology says people who can't stand being the center of attention even for something good - a birthday, an achievement, a toast - aren't shy or humble, they were raised in an environment where being seen too clearly was a setup for criticism or punishment, and the flush they feel when a room turns toward them is a threat response their body has never retired, even for love - Silicon Canals
Some individuals struggle with positive attention due to learned survival responses from childhood, where visibility equated to vulnerability.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
4 days agoPsychology says the unhappiest men in any room aren't the ones who complain - they're the ones who've become so skilled at performing contentment that they've lost the ability to locate their own actual feelings beneath the performance - Silicon Canals
Many men mask their true feelings behind a facade of competence and ease, leading to emotional disconnection and confusion about their own emotions.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoPsychology says a truly successful life isn't measured by what you've accumulated, it's measured by whether the people closest to you feel more like themselves or less like themselves after spending time with you - Silicon Canals
Success should be measured by the quality of relationships and personal fulfillment rather than external achievements.
fromwww.theguardian.com
17 hours agoI felt like I'd stumbled on a cheat code': what is the burned haystack dating method?
The BHDM has two main components: the 10 rules of engagement, which include not spending too much time on the apps and blocking any user who doesn't seem like a match.
Relationships
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoPsychology says the reason so many high-achievers can't enjoy their own wins isn't imposter syndrome, it's that achievement was the language they were taught love was spoken in, and they've never learned to receive love in any other form - Silicon Canals
High-achievers often feel unsatisfied with their accomplishments due to a childhood belief that achievement equals worth.
#loneliness
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoPsychology says the loneliest form of love isn't being unloved its being adored for a version of yourself you've been performing so long that the real you has started to feel like the imposter - Silicon Canals
The worst loneliness is being loved for a false self that no longer exists.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoPsychology says people who stack plates and tidy up before leaving a restaurant aren't being polite - they're managing a deep anxiety about being perceived as the kind of person who leaves a mess, and the compulsion often traces back to a single childhood household rule they were never allowed to question - Silicon Canals
Compulsive tidying in public spaces often stems from childhood rules that create anxiety about how others perceive us.
#friendship
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoPsychology says the adult who has acquaintances but no close friends isn't failing socially - they're often someone who learned early that real closeness came with conditions, and a polite distance has always felt safer than the bill - Silicon Canals
Emotional distance in friendships often stems from conditioned avoidance learned in childhood, not a failure of social skills.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoI'm 37 and I just realized that the reason I have no close friends isn't because I'm hard to love - it's because I learned young that needing people was dangerous - Silicon Canals
Recognizing patterns in friendships reveals a fear of vulnerability and a tendency to withdraw as relationships deepen.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoSocial psychologists say the friendships we lose in adulthood aren't lost to conflict or distance - they're lost to the moment one person stops initiating and the other interprets the silence as confirmation they were never that important - Silicon Canals
Friendships often end not through conflict but through unreciprocated effort and silent interpretations of communication gaps.
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoRelationships
Psychology says people who drop their friends as soon as they get into a new relationship aren't choosing love over friendship - they're revealing that the friendships were always filling a need the relationship now fills, and the difference between a friend and a placeholder is something most people only discover when the relationship arrives and the friends quietly disappear - Silicon Canals
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoPsychology says the adult who has acquaintances but no close friends isn't failing socially - they're often someone who learned early that real closeness came with conditions, and a polite distance has always felt safer than the bill - Silicon Canals
Emotional distance in friendships often stems from conditioned avoidance learned in childhood, not a failure of social skills.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoI'm 37 and I just realized that the reason I have no close friends isn't because I'm hard to love - it's because I learned young that needing people was dangerous - Silicon Canals
Recognizing patterns in friendships reveals a fear of vulnerability and a tendency to withdraw as relationships deepen.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoSocial psychologists say the friendships we lose in adulthood aren't lost to conflict or distance - they're lost to the moment one person stops initiating and the other interprets the silence as confirmation they were never that important - Silicon Canals
Friendships often end not through conflict but through unreciprocated effort and silent interpretations of communication gaps.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
6 days agoPeople don't stay in friendships they've outgrown because they're weak - they stay because identity is bound up in being the kind of person who doesn't abandon people - Silicon Canals
People stay in outgrown friendships due to their identity being tied to the idea of not leaving, not out of cowardice or weakness.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoPsychology says people who drop their friends as soon as they get into a new relationship aren't choosing love over friendship - they're revealing that the friendships were always filling a need the relationship now fills, and the difference between a friend and a placeholder is something most people only discover when the relationship arrives and the friends quietly disappear - Silicon Canals
Friendships often fade when one partner enters a romantic relationship, revealing the superficial nature of some connections.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoPsychology suggests there's a certain type of anger that lives inside the most agreeable people - it's the anger of swallowing every small injustice, every dismissive comment, every overlooked contribution for decades, and the reason the calmest person in your family might one day explode over something trivial isn't the trivial thing, it's the fifty years of larger things they never allowed themselves to react to - Silicon Canals
Agreeableness can lead to emotional accumulation, resulting in explosive reactions over seemingly trivial matters due to suppressed feelings.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
4 days agoPsychology says people who are liked by everyone but have no close friends have perfected the art of being liked without ever being known - and the distance between those two things is where their loneliness actually lives, invisible to everyone who enjoys their company and unbearable to the person providing it - Silicon Canals
Mastering likability can lead to isolation, as it prevents genuine connections and vulnerability with others.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoPsychology says the loneliest people in middle age aren't the ones without a partner - they're the ones in long marriages where both people stopped being curious about each other years ago, and they share a bed, a calendar, and a life with someone they've quietly stopped knowing, and loneliness in a full house has a specific weight that single loneliness doesn't carry - Silicon Canals
Loneliness can occur in relationships where partners share space but lack genuine emotional connection.
#relationships
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
6 days agoI realized this year that every relationship I've stayed too long in was one where I had to be quieter to make it work - Silicon Canals
Compromising in relationships can lead to diminishing one's authentic self, resulting in a quieter, less expressive version of oneself.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
4 days agoThere's a specific kind of tiredness that belongs to people who are the default contact for every family emergency. It isn't the emergencies themselves. It's the low-grade readiness that never switches off, the phone always near, the nervous system perpetually on call for a shift that never formally ends - Silicon Canals
Being an emergency contact involves a constant state of anticipation and stress that affects overall well-being, not just during crises.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
5 days agoPsychology says people who constantly apologize for things that aren't their fault aren't being polite. They grew up in an environment where someone else's bad mood was always their responsibility to fix - Silicon Canals
Over-apologizing often stems from childhood experiences that teach individuals to manage others' emotions, leading to chronic self-blame and anxiety.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
5 days agoPsychology suggests people who dislike surprises, even good ones, are running a system that values safety over delight - not because they don't want to feel joy but because joy that arrives without warning feels almost identical to danger in a body that was trained to treat the two as the same thing - Silicon Canals
Unexpected surprises can trigger a fight-or-flight response due to a nervous system trained to perceive unpredictability as a threat.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
4 days agoI'm 37 and I finally understand why I keep saying yes to things I want to say no to - psychology calls it "fawning" and once you see it you can't unsee it - Silicon Canals
Fawning behavior leads to difficulty in saying no, causing resentment despite self-awareness and understanding of its irrationality.
fromPsychology Today
2 months agoWhat "Acts of Desperation" Reveals About Toxic Love
In contemporary publishing, female characters are often portrayed as hyper-independent: self-possessed, boundary-savvy, and well-contained. Emotional unavailability, especially in men, is still packaged as independence, mystery, even depth. Meanwhile, real-world romance is dominated by swipe culture, avoidance, and chronic ambiguity. "Keeping it casual" is a default stance, and ghosting is treated as a communication style. Meg Nolan's novel Acts of Desperation offers an unflinching portrait of attachment wounds, longing, and self-betrayal, without rescue fantasies and without a tidy resolution.
Books
LGBT
fromSlate Magazine
2 months agoI'm Having Great Sex With a Beautiful Woman. If Only She Knew What I Was Thinking About During It.
A person in a new stable relationship experiences intrusive sexual memories of a previous male partner, causing uncertainty about sexual orientation and presence during sex.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoPsychology says people who let their pets sleep in their bed aren't clingy or emotionally stunted - they've found one of the only relationships in modern life that offers unconditional presence without the performance anxiety that makes human connection so exhausting - Silicon Canals
Needing comfort from pets is not a weakness; it can enhance emotional well-being and reduce anxiety.
fromPsychology Today
1 month agoWhen OCD Wrecks Love
Valentine's Day is supposed to be a celebration of love and romance, but if you have romance-related OCD, also known as ROCD, then the recent celebration of love may have instead been a trigger for obsessions and compulsions around trying to determine if the person you are with is the right person. Doubt about whether your partner is truly the love of your life can become overwhelming and trap you
Mental health
Relationships
fromSlate Magazine
1 month agoI've Fallen in Love. But This Is the One Sort of Person I'm Not "Supposed" to Be With.
Sexual orientation and romantic attraction can be fluid and evolve throughout life; mutual love and attraction are valuable regardless of how they fit previous self-definitions.
fromPsychology Today
2 months agoWhy 'I Just Need Space' Isn't About Falling Out of Love
What they say instead is something softer, more nuanced: " I just want space." They describe feeling overwhelmed when their partner asks for physical affection, quality time, or emotional closeness. Not because those requests are unreasonable, but because they feel they have nothing left to give. What can look like withdrawal from love in fact often seems more like emotional exhaustion.
Relationships
fromPsychology Today
2 months agoEight Ways to Show Love to Your Love
Love is more than a physical attraction and belief in the concept of soul mates. Love is also about choices, decisions, and even forgiveness. Lasting relationships can thrive when partners: Gratitude strengthens love It was a conversation with John Kralik, author of 365 Thank Yous, that inspired Revitalize Your Love Life with a Three-Day Gratitude Plan. With the gratitude plan, you are essentially clearing out feelings that keep your relationship from thriving. The ultimate goal is to create a mindset for unconditional love.
Relationships
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