"I took my 5-year-old daughter to the neighborhood park today. Invited a friend and his girls, ages 6 and 2. Usually our kids play very well together. At the park we ran into a girl who we've played with before. Let's call her Denise. She's 10 and comes to the park by herself. We're not sure where she lives, but it must be within walking distance. But that's not my only problem with her."
"I've had issues before with her being a troublemaker and not respecting boundaries: She's gone digging in our snack bag without permission, buried my sunglasses in the dirt as a "joke," and plays too rough with the little kids at the park. Today she was doing everything she could to split up my daughter and her friend. I encouraged them to find games everyone could play together, started a game of hide and seek."
"Denise continued to find ways to separate them. The outing ended after Denise walked over, holding hands with my daughter's friend, and said, "You can only be friends with one of us, you have to choose." My kiddo (who isn't prone to emotional outbursts in public) ran off sobbing. Denise yelled, "Pranked ya!" and laughed hysterically."
A five-year-old was upset at a neighborhood park after a ten-year-old repeatedly provoked and manipulated play, invaded belongings, and played too roughly with younger children. The older child separated friends, buried sunglasses as a "joke," and declared a forced choice between playmates, causing the younger child to run off crying. The behavior suggests boundary issues and possible instability in the older child's home life. Adults should prioritize the younger child's emotional safety, set clear limits, teach coping strategies and assertive responses, attempt to engage the older child's caregivers or community supports, and supervise or intervene calmly on future visits.
Read at Slate Magazine
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