Therapists Warn These Red Flags Mean You'll Likely Clash With Your In-Laws

""I often see boundary issues as an early warning sign," Amanda E. White, LPC, licensed therapist and CEO of Therapy for Women Center , told HuffPost. "If someone's partner would never let a friend drop by unannounced, but thinks it's fine when their mother does, that inconsistency [could be] a problem." When boundary issues come into play early on in the form of unexpected visits or overreaching, it could be an indicator that these challenges might worsen over time, particularly if grandchildren become involved."

"According to therapists, it helps if couples are aligned on what their boundaries are and how they'd like them to be respected. "If one partner takes over leading all the boundary conversations with the in-laws, it creates triangulation and scapegoating," White said, adding that it can be helpful for the person whose direct family is involved to take the first line of communication."

Relationships with in-laws are influenced by changes such as grandchildren, geographic proximity, and evolving comfort between people. Boundary issues often act as an early warning sign of future conflict. Inconsistent enforcement—permitting parents privileges not allowed for others—creates resentment. Early unexpected visits and overreaching can worsen over time, particularly when grandchildren become involved. Couples benefit from aligning on specific boundaries and how those boundaries should be respected. If one partner leads all conversations about boundaries, triangulation and scapegoating can occur. The person with direct family ties can take the first line of communication, and setting boundaries does not have to be combative.

Read at HuffPost