Rowing through the fog: how to increase your tolerance for uncertainty

Simone Stolzoff describes himself as naturally uncertain, prone to rumination and self-doubt, which can help in journalism but also create personal strain. While working in New York, he faced a choice between a journalism path and a design-firm job in San Francisco, feeling intensely conflicted and repeatedly seeking input from many people. He ultimately chose the San Francisco role, which led to a new book, How to Not Know: The Value of Uncertainty in a World That Demands Answers. He later identified his mistake as trying to feel certain, explaining that humans evolved to reduce uncertainty for safety, yet modern triggers and unknowable futures can mislead people. The key question becomes how to cope with not knowing.

"Simone Stolzoff describes himself as naturally an uncertain person inclined to rumination and self-doubt. This tendency benefits him in his work as a journalist, but can otherwise be a double-edged sword. While working for a magazine in New York, Stolzoff was approached about a job at a design firm in San Francisco. Now, he laughs at how tortured he felt having to decide between two attractive career paths. But, at the time, it really sent me for an existential loop, he says."

"I could see these two diverging paths Simone the journalist, Simone the designer and, for the life of me, I could not make up my mind. Stolzoff talked his options through with everybody. My yoga teacher, my Uber driver, all my friends and family He grimaces. I was insufferable. He wound up choosing the San Francisco job: a new home, an unfamiliar industry. The experience informed his new book, How to Not Know: The Value of Uncertainty in a World That Demands Answers."

"Looking back, Stolzoff says over video-call from his home in the Bay Area, his mistake was aspiring to feel certain: It was my intolerance of uncertainty that was causing so much of the angst. Trying to anticipate the future and make plans with confidence is unique to humans, and evolved to keep us safe. But, especially in these uncertain times, it can easily lead us astray, says Stolzoff: We have these brains that are wired to get out of uncertainty as quickly as possible, in a world where there are triggers all around us."

"Because the future is unknowable, the real question is how we can learn to cope better with not knowing, Stolzoff says. Our conversation has been condensed and edited for clarity. Why did you write this book? My first book, The Good Enough Job, is about how work came to be so central to our identities. The most common question asked by readers was How should I think about the future of my career, given AI and all these other changing forces? How to Not Know by Simone Stolzoff Photograph: W. W. Norton & C"

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